A Hammock – In Your Crotch?

The male urethral sling is another option for guys who have mild to moderate random peeing (stress incontinence). It’s a surgically-implanted mesh hammock (yes, just like the hammock you have in your backyard, only a bit smaller) that’s anchored on each side to your pubic bones transvaginal mesh lawsuit. The hammock compresses your urethra where it passes underneath your pubic bones and, theoretically, keeps you from randomly peeing.

You might have a hard time emptying your bladder during the first couple weeks after you have the hammock implanted-this might mean Mr. Happy would need a catheter.

In a study done with guys who have a random peeing problem and had the mesh hammock implanted, 40 percent were completely dry, 40 percent were much improved and 20 percent still peed their pants.

After you’ve had something implanted in your crotch that has a life expectancy of five or six years, might not stop you from peeing your pants and has a relatively short life span, you really should celebrate by going out and buying that used Yugo you always wanted.

And there aren’t any medications that will cure random peeing resulting from a prostatectomy, radiation therapy or transurethral resection of your prostate (TURP). But there are other options, and some of them might work for you: one of them involves behavioral changes-cut back on the amount of liquid you drink, pee as often as you possibly can, lose weight and be less physically active.

Another option is pelvic floor muscle activity-pelvic muscle training and/or certain exercises that can strengthen the pelvic muscles and enhance the ability of your pucker muscle to control your random peeing. Still another option is electric stimulation therapy-low voltage electric current is used to simulate and contract muscles. It’s done in the doctor’s office. And please, don’t try this at home.

And, of course, there are diapers, pull-ups, pads, pant-liners, and some diapers that can be taped to your belly-none of them are designed to look good under tennis shorts.

You might also have need for a penis-pincher (there’s a brand name for it-ask your urologist). Guess what it does? Yup-it clamps onto Mr. Happy and keeps you from randomly peeing and it allows Mr. Happy’s blood to circulate. And it has a companion piece, the pee-catcher. The name kind of gives it away, but in case you didn’t get it, it soaks up the pee that got by your penis-pincher. Without it, you can probably count on pee-stained pants.

James Norris is a University of Wisconsin graduate and a seasoned investigative journalist. His writing skills were honed during the 50s and 60s under the mentorship of (the late) Wilson Hicks, executive editor of Life magazine. He is the author of To Pee or Not To Pee.

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